Perceiving concealment in relationships between parents and adolescents: Links with parental behavior

Although concealment in relationships is commonplace, little is known about its implications for the target of concealment. Two large-scale studies among adolescents and their parents tested the central hypothesis that parents’ perception of child concealment predicts poorer parenting behaviors toward their child. Further, we investigated whether actual child concealment adds to the prediction of parenting behaviors through an interaction with parental perception of concealment. Study 1 yielded evidence for the hypothesized link, which was independent of actual concealment. Study 2 largely replicated these results for perceptions of both concealment and lying while controlling for perceptions of disclosure. Overall, these results suggest that parents’ perception of child concealment coincides with poorer parenting behaviors, regardless of actual child concealment. Concealment in relationships is a common phenomenon that occurs when one relationship partner intentionally withholds information from the other (Finkenauer & Hazam, 2000; Lane & Wegner, 1995). Almost everybody can remember an instant when he or she intentionally concealed information from a relationship partner, including a family member (Vangelisti, 1994), friends (DePaulo & Kashy, 1998), parents (Guerrero & Afifi, 1995), romantic partners (Baxter & Wilmot, 1985), and spouses (Finkenauer & Hazam). Research on concealment in relationships has focused mainly on the concealer, studying his or her reasons for concealment (e.g., Baxter & Wilmot), the underlying motivations to avoid and conceal information from partners (e.g., Afifi & Guerrero, 2000), the physical and psychosocial correlates of concealing information (e.g., Finkenauer, Engels, & Meeus, 2002), and the link between concealment and relational satisfaction (e.g., Caughlin et al., 2000). In contrast, much less attention has been directed toward studying the implications of concealment for the target of the concealment. This neglect is unfortunate because investigation of the significance of concealment for the target of concealmentmay provide a fuller understanding of its relational implications. The empirical evidence suggests a consistent association between individuals’ concealment in relationships and their relational dissatisfaction (Caughlin et al., 2000; Golish, 2000; Vangelisti, 1994). Moreover, perceptions of one’s partner’s concealment are also related to dissatisfaction with the relationship (e.g., Caughlin & Golish, 2002; Finkenauer & Hazam, 2000). In fact, Caughlin and Golish found that individuals’ perceptions of their partners’ topic avoidance were more strongly Rutger Engels was supported by a fellowship of the Netherlands Organization for Scientific Research (NWO) during the preparation of this manuscript. Tom Frijns was supported by Grant 42520701 from the NWO. Correspondence should be addressed to Catrin Finkenauer, Free University of Amsterdam, Department of Social Psychology, 1081 BT Amsterdam, The Netherlands, e-mail: [email protected]. Personal Relationships, 12 (2005), 387–406. Printed in the United States of America. Copyright 2005 IARR. 1350-4126=05